Are You Dating a Boy or a Man? Here Are Some Tips to Find Out…

Since I began this blog, a lot of friends (and even some strangers, which I find extremely exciting) will tag or send me things that have to do with dating. And I love that!

Recently, my mentor emailed me this article, with the assumption that I’ve already seen it, but to both of our surprise, I hadn’t.

Amy Chan is a fellow writer and blogger about all things relationships–which means we’d instantly be BFFs (I can picture it now: sippin’ on lattes as we roll our eyes and laugh at our embarrassing but valuable dating record).

One of her most recent posts talked about–in my opinion–a huge #problemwithdating. So I had to share…

The 11 Differences Between Dating a Boy vs. a Man provides great content, full of honest and relatable points that resonated with me. After discussing the what-was-I-thinking phase of chasing after unavailable boys, something most girls struggle with in their 20s, Chan illustrates the importance of needing to first transition from a girl into a woman, which will ultimately lead you to dating a man instead of a boy.

And in case you can’t tell the difference, she offers some tips. 11 tips, to be exact. All of which are valid, but these ones stuck out to me:

  • A man knows what he wants, and goes for it. A boy may have somewhat of an idea, but not really. He doesn’t think too much about it, and even if he does, doesn’t exert much effort to get it. A boy is passive, a man is assertive.
  • A man looks for a woman with intelligence, who is supportive, grounded and encompasses a shared set of values when choosing a partner. A boy cares mostly only for girls who are hot, wild and exciting.
  • A man knows when to invest in a woman and jump in with two feet. A boy is always “testing” – he doesn’t fully commit because he never knows if he is quite ready. But the truth is, because he is a boy, regardless of who he meets, he will never be ready due to the stage of life he is in.
  • A man has integrity. He means what he says, and says what he means. He has follow through and actions his promises. And if he can’t he has the guts to tell you why. A boy makes promises but doesn’t follow through.

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